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View Full Version : Why did the chicken cross the road?


Fred
03-01-2003, 01:38 AM
GEORGE W. BUSH

We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We
just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or
not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is
no middle ground here.


AL GORE

I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the
chicken crossing the road represented the application of these
two different functions of government in a new, reinvented way
designed to bring greater services to the American people.


RALPH NADER

The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been
polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not
reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road
because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.


PAT BUCHANAN

To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.


RUSH LIMBAUGH

I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it
was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet
someone out there is already forming a support group to help
chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this?
How much more of this can real Americans take? Chickens
crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars, and when I say
tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the
government took from you to build roads for chickens to cross.


DR. SEUSS

Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes, the chicken crossed the road. But why it crossed, I've
not been told!


ERNEST HEMINGWAY

To die. In the rain. Alone.


MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.

I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads
without having their motives called into question.


GRANDPA

In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that
was good enough for us.


BARBARA WALTERS

Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to
the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of
how it experienced a serious case of molting and went on to
accomplish its life-long dream of crossing the road.


JOHN LENNON

Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.


ARISTOTLE

It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.


KARL MARX

It was a historical inevitability.


SADDAM HUSSEIN

This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite
justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.


VOLTAIRE

I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend
to the death its right to do it.


RONALD REAGAN

What chicken?


CAPTAIN KIRK

To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.


FOX MULDER

You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more
chickens have to cross before you believe it?


SIGMUND FREUD

The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken
crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.


BILL GATES

I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross
roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and
balance your checkbook and Internet Explorer is an inextricable
part of eChicken.


MARTHA STEWART

No one called to warn me which way that chicken was going. I
had a standing order at the farmer's market to sell my eggs
when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave
me any insider information.


ALBERT EINSTEIN

Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move
beneath the chicken?


BILL CLINTON

I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you
mean by chicken? Could you define chicken, please?


THE BIBLE

And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the
chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed
the road, and there was much rejoicing.


COLONEL SANDERS

I missed one?

jan
03-01-2003, 01:57 PM
Loved it.

FTP Guy
03-01-2003, 02:19 PM
LOL...

FRANK PERDUE

Don't worry, I'll get it on this side...