jan
03-28-2003, 10:41 PM
Saddam was sitting in his cave wondering which country to
Invade next, when his telephone rang.
"Hallo, Mr. Saddam" a heavily accented voice said. "This is Archie,
down 'ere at the Harp Seal Pub in Badger's Cove, Newfoundland, Canada eh?
I am callin' to tells ya dat we are officially declaring war on you eh!"
"Well Archie," Saddam replied, "This is indeed important news! How big
is your army?"
"Right now," said Archie, after a moments calculation "there is
myself, me cousin Harold, me next-door-neighbor Mick, and the whole dart
team from the pub. That makes eight!"
Saddam paused. "I must tell you Archie, that I have one million
men in my army waiting to move on my command."
"Holy jeez," said Archie. "I'll have ta call ya back!" Sure enough, the
next day, Archie called again. "Mr. Saddam, the war is still on! We have
managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"
"And what equipment would that be Archie?", Saddam asked.
"Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Harry's farm
tractor."
Saddam sighed. "I must tell you Archie, that have 16,000 tanks and 14,000
armoured personnel carriers. Also I've increased my army to one and a
half million since we last spoke."
"Lard T'underin' Jaysus, bye", said Archie, "I'll be getting
back to ya."
Sure enough, Archie rang again the next day. "Mr. Saddam, the
war is still on! We have managed to git ourselves airborne! We up an'
modified Harrigan's ultra-light wit a couple of shotguns in the cockpit,
and four byes from the Legion have joined us as well!"
Saddam was silent for a minute then cleared his throat. "I must tell you
Archie that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000 fighter planes. My military
complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites.
And since we last spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"
"Jeysus, Mary and Joseph," said Archie, "I'll have ta call youse back."
Sure enough, Archie called again the next day. "Mr. Saddam! I am
sorry to have to tell you dat we have had to call off dis 'ere war."
"I'm sorry to hear that" said Saddam. "Why the sudden change of heart?"
"Well, sir," said Archie, "we've all sat ourselves down and had a long
chat over a bunch of pints, and come to realize dat dere's no way we can
feed two million prisoners."
NEVER UNDERESTIMATE NEWFIE POWER!!!
Invade next, when his telephone rang.
"Hallo, Mr. Saddam" a heavily accented voice said. "This is Archie,
down 'ere at the Harp Seal Pub in Badger's Cove, Newfoundland, Canada eh?
I am callin' to tells ya dat we are officially declaring war on you eh!"
"Well Archie," Saddam replied, "This is indeed important news! How big
is your army?"
"Right now," said Archie, after a moments calculation "there is
myself, me cousin Harold, me next-door-neighbor Mick, and the whole dart
team from the pub. That makes eight!"
Saddam paused. "I must tell you Archie, that I have one million
men in my army waiting to move on my command."
"Holy jeez," said Archie. "I'll have ta call ya back!" Sure enough, the
next day, Archie called again. "Mr. Saddam, the war is still on! We have
managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"
"And what equipment would that be Archie?", Saddam asked.
"Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Harry's farm
tractor."
Saddam sighed. "I must tell you Archie, that have 16,000 tanks and 14,000
armoured personnel carriers. Also I've increased my army to one and a
half million since we last spoke."
"Lard T'underin' Jaysus, bye", said Archie, "I'll be getting
back to ya."
Sure enough, Archie rang again the next day. "Mr. Saddam, the
war is still on! We have managed to git ourselves airborne! We up an'
modified Harrigan's ultra-light wit a couple of shotguns in the cockpit,
and four byes from the Legion have joined us as well!"
Saddam was silent for a minute then cleared his throat. "I must tell you
Archie that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000 fighter planes. My military
complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites.
And since we last spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"
"Jeysus, Mary and Joseph," said Archie, "I'll have ta call youse back."
Sure enough, Archie called again the next day. "Mr. Saddam! I am
sorry to have to tell you dat we have had to call off dis 'ere war."
"I'm sorry to hear that" said Saddam. "Why the sudden change of heart?"
"Well, sir," said Archie, "we've all sat ourselves down and had a long
chat over a bunch of pints, and come to realize dat dere's no way we can
feed two million prisoners."
NEVER UNDERESTIMATE NEWFIE POWER!!!